Starting Today, Real ID And Proof Of Paid Arts Tax Required To Fly At PDX

As of yesterday travelers must provide two official forms of documentation to board flights leaving from Portland International Airport. The first is a Real ID compliant federally issued driver’s license, learners permit or non-driver ID. The second is proof of paid arts tax, which can be printed out from the City government’s website.

“We recommend showing up two hours early for a domestic flight and three hours early for an international flight,” said the Department of Homeland Security’s Portland bureau chief Alexaundra Caruso. “Once our skilled security staff is able to verify your identity, they will also verify that you are supporting the artistic development of our Portland Public Schools’ students. The Real ID program was born after the September 11th skyjackers used fake drivers licenses to board planes and I think Osama BL himself would roll in his grave if he knew that such a heinous act would result in such beautiful art from American children.”

Travelers did not share her optimism. “I don’t understand what any of this has to do with national security,” scoffed Sellwood resident Pancho Menashe. “The arts tax is such a hassle and now I have to remember to print out proof and bring it? I’m just trying to fly to Duluth, man.”

While passengers from outside of Portland are exempted from the arts tax requirement, Caruso encourages them to voluntarily submit the fee, “For the kids, for the arts, for freedom of America and freedom of expression.”

Folks who don’t want to deal with the hassle of obtaining a real ID can still use their McMenamins passport as TSA compliant acceptable ID.