Lactose Intolerant Friend Getting The Farty Started

A pleasant evening went from festive to funky for Emily Evans on Sunday as she heard the dreaded gurgle rise from within. “Oh god,” she groaned, clutching her stomach. “Why now? I specifically asked the waiter if the stew had cream in it.”⁣⁣
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At press time, Evans was making a desperate pitch to move the party from her friend Andy’s 550-square-foot apartment, most of which she had thoroughly crop dusted.⁣⁣